If I’m afraid of something, I’ll put it off for as long as possible. Fear of failure – and fear of success – is the perfect excuse for me to procrastinate. There are much better things to do than work on my website, I’ll tell myself. Look at that dusty shelf! I should clean it. Wouldn’t my books look better if they were colour-coded? I think I’ll do that right now!
And while I’m doing these very necessary things, I’ll keep asking myself the same questions:
What if I’m not good enough?
What if other people judge me, or worse, laugh at me? What are they saying behind my back?
But what if I AM good enough? What if I’m more successful than I ever thought possible?
I could question myself like this all day if it means I can avoid doing the hard work to make that success happen. Eventually, I’ll reach the other extreme – where I can’t possibly procrastinate anymore and it will be now or never. Jump in the deep end, and sink or swim.
Surprisingly, I’m good in these situations too. When I have no choice but to face the fear and do it anyway, I usually surprise myself by what I can achieve!
This got me thinking… what if I stop torturing myself by constantly wondering IF I’ll be good enough and worrying about what other people will think, and just DO it? Where would I be today if I had adopted this attitude years ago? We can’t keep walking on eggshells around other people, wondering if they’ll disagree with the choices we make for our own lives – we’re the ones who have to live with them! And here’s a little secret: most of the time, people are too caught up in their own lives and their own fears to care about what we’re doing.
It’s time we start trusting in ourselves and in our instincts again. Trusting in our abilities and our potential to achieve great things.
I’m good enough. You’re good enough. We’re all good enough.
And if people care about you enough to gossip, take it as a compliment! Their gossiping is a reflection of who they are, not who you are. Besides, you have better things to do. Not dusting shelves and colour coordinating your bookshelf. But smashing your goals. Facing the fear and surprising yourself by the results.
I’m not saying it will be easy. It will take strength, persistence, and determination. Sure, you might want to put your head through the wall, too. But be sure to balance that out with rest, self reflection and self care.
These holidays, take the time to be a bit selfish. Focus inwards and decide what YOU want to achieve next year. Write it down, sleep on it, reflect on it while you’re sipping a gin by the pool. Then come back next year, book a discovery call with me, and let’s face your fear together. It’s now or never. Sink or swim. Your mental wellbeing is as important as your physical wellbeing. Invest in it, nurture it, and enjoy the outcomes!
My studio closes on 22 December and reopens on 2 January 2019. Have a wonderful holiday. Sleep, eat, and enjoy the time with your loved ones.